Oh, the Irony
by Book-Smarts101
Summary: A series of one-shots. Following who? Well thats simple! The Demigods and Gods of PJatO! Follow your favorite characters as they go through the most...interesting... days at Camp-Half Blood, Olympus, and, uh, some "Remote Locations". Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Nico focused. Percy focused. Both intensifying on their enemy.

"You'll never win against me, Perseus Jackson the Great." Percy said, his eyes never leaving Nico's.

Nico scoffed. " You save Olympus one time and people look at you like you're a god".

The hero smirked. "Well, they did offer it."

Nico, about to retort, felt a new stinging sensation. "Crud" Percy smirked seeing what he meant.

You could see the pain and struggle in Nico's eyes. "One " Percy said, counting the seconds before victory. Nico bit his lip.

"Two" He balled up his fist.

"Three" _Blink_

"Damn it!" Nico grumbled. Percy couldn't contain himself anymore. He burst out laughing.

"I win!" he said in between laughs. " Yeah, yeah, whatever, but I'll beat you tomorrow " Nico said

"That's what you said yesterday… and the day before that… and the day before that!" Percy exclaimed. "That's it" Nico muttered under his breath.

_That afternoon, no one even noticed a certain son of Posiedon being chased through the forest by an army of dead soldiers._


	2. Chapter 2

Everyone was at the dining pavilion eating dinner (well duh). As everyone settled down, Chiron pounded the hard floor with his hooves. As always this got everyone's attention.

"Campers, this coming Thursday the Gods and Goddesses will be visiting us."

Some groaned. Some sighed. They'd seen this coming. Apparently reality finally punched the gods in the face. It was either that or Aphrodite had been watching talk shows about parenting again.

Annabeth spoke up. " Chiron, how long will they be staying?"

"2 weeks."

Crud.

_5 days later, the arrival of the gods…yay._

One by one, they all appeared.

Even Artemis appeared for, uh, really she came for no apparent reason.

What happened next really surprised everyone.

"Yo, yo, what's up my famil-a?" Zues said

Yeah, how's it going home-slices?" This time Poseidon.

And last but not least, " Whats trippin, yo?" from Hades.

Finally Annabeth turned to her mom. "Mom?" Athena sighed.

"Aphrodite, has told them that they have lost their "mojo" again."

"Wait, agai-" "Don't ask" Athena cut her off. But since something always goes wrong (or in this case random) when the gods come…well I think you know what happens next.

Nico and Hades went off to cry in a dark corner.

Percy and Posiedon went skateboarding.

Athena and her kids ran into the forest, screaming aimlessly.

Apollo and his kids hid under a rock, hissing something about artichokes.

Zues and Thalia had a rapping contest.

Aphrodite and her kids went off hunting cantaloupes.

Ares and his little runts went to the spa.

Hepheastus and his kids went to dye their hair green.

Demeter and her kids started crying about how they broke their nails while gardening.

Hermes and his kids went digging holes.

Dionysus and his kids just fainted.

Everyone that doesn't have kids just flashed out.

And Artemis, well, uh, no one still knows what she's doing or why she's here.

…..

Ah, yes, another perfectly normal day at Camp-Half Blood.


	3. Chapter 3

"Done" Annabeth declared as she put the last gumdrop on her candy replica of the Eiffel Tower. "Perfect"

Just then Percy walked. "Annabeth," he whined. "What do you want now Seaweed Brain?" Annabeth asked. " Can I have five dollars?" Percy asked.

Annabeth rolled her eyes. "What for?" "Marshmallows!" Percy exclaimed

Annabeth sighed, while grabbing her purse. While doing so she caught him looking at her Eiffel Tower.

"NO, no, no, no! Don't even think about- don't even think about thinking about it! NO, NO, NO, NO!" Annabeth practically screamed.

"Fine! I wont eat! Can I just have my five bucks?" Percy asked

Annabeth handed him the money and suspiciously watched him as he walked out of the door.

..._Later that night, around 2:00 A.M_…..

Annabeth silently woke up as she heard footsteps around the cabin.

She heard a few chews and then a pause. This went on for about 5 minutes before she heard the scratching of a pencil and the door of the cabin close silently.

Cautiously, Annabeth got up and searched the cabin. Nothing seemed strange until she saw her Eiffel Tower completely gone, except for a few peppermints and gumdrops.

She felt rage fill her body as she picked up a note that was resting next to the table, where her replica used to be.

_Wise Girl, _

_Your project was delicious. Make me another, m'kay?_

_-Seaweed Brain_

"PERCY" Annabeth screamed, waking up the whole camp.

….

_Somewhere near by, a certain Seaweed Brain chuckled, while heading towards the lake… the only safe place from a certain Wise Girl's wrath. _


	4. Chapter 4

Annabeth, Percy, and Grover were sitting together in Percy's cabin.

"Sooooo bored" Percy whined. Annabeth and Grover rolled their eyes.

"Well then what do you want to do?" Annabeth asked. Grover nodded.

A light bulb went off in Percy's brain. His kelp-filled brain, to be exact. "Lets play Truth or Dare!"

Annabeth blinked then shrugged. "Yeah, sure" "M'kay" Grover responded. "Alright, I'll go first" Percy declared.

"Grover, truth or dare?" Percy asked. "Truth, no dare, no truth!" "Which one? " Annabeth exclaimed.

"Truth"

"Do you really like being the new God of the Wild?" asked Percy. Typical Percy. Lame.

"No Percy, I absolutely hate it. It's _not_ what I've always wanted my entire life." Grover responded sarcastically.

Percy rolled his eyes. "Just take your turn already".

"Alright. Annabeth, Truth or Dare?" "Dare" Annabeth responded.

"I dare you to go fake propose to Chiron."

Annabeth stifled a laugh. "Your so immature" she said, but walked outside anyway. Percy and Grover crowded the windows to watch.

… _Meanwhile Outside, near the Big House… _

"Hello Annabeth." Chiron said greeting the daughter of Athena.

"Chiron, I've been meaning to talk to you" was Annabeth's reply.

"Anything," Chiron said. Annabeth got on one knee.

"Chiron, will you marry me?" Annabeth asked, holding in a laugh.

"Uh, well you see, um,…" Chiron said uncomfortably. Annabeth couldn't hold it in anymore. She let out a laugh and got off her knee.

"Relax Chiron, it was just a dare from Grover, I'm not really asking you to marry me."

"Well that's a relief. Anyway, you should head off to your cabin now, Annabeth. Have a goodnight." Chiron said as he trotted off.

Annabeth smirked as she walked back to Percy's cabin.

She went inside to see Percy and Grover with big grins on their faces.

"Soooo….when's the wedding?"


	5. Chapter 5

It was mid-day at Camp-Half Blood, and as usual Katie Gardner was tending the strawberry fields.

As Katie was weeding a plant, she heard footsteps behind her. _Please don't be __him_Katie thought as the footsteps stopped.

"Hey Katie Flower"_ he _said. Katie sighed. Yeah…it was him. "What do you want Travis?" She said. "I really don't have time for this."

Travis pretended to be shocked. "Katie! I'm offended! And besides can't I talk to my little Dirt Head?"

"Really, Dirt Head? You know what? I just really don't know what to say to that." Katie said

.…Awkward Silence….

"Hey, ya know I heard Mr.D turned a new son of Nemesis into a chinchilla today" Travis offered.

At hearing Travis say this, Katie just put her tools down, and looked at Travis with a blank look.

"Wow. You know what? Hearing you say that just made my day," Katie said sarcastically. "Now, why are you _really_ here?"

Travis smirked. "Well this defiantly _isn't _a distraction," he said, stretching the "isn't".

"What are you-oh no," Katie said realization hitting her. She quickly got up and ran to the Demeter cabin, Travis right behind her.

Katie's mouth dropped open as she saw her beloved cabin painted hot pink with fake flowers surrounding it.

"Don't worry," said Conner as he joined his brother's side. "It'll wear off eventually… in about 4 months.

….

_That evening no one even payed any attention to the pain-filled screams echoing through the forest._


	6. Chapter 6

After a tiring day of hunting, Artemis and her huntresses were finally ready to just take a break.

Unfortunately though, something always happens to break the peace around their little camp.

As their fire reached it's blazing point, there was rustle from a nearby bush. Just as the hunters raised their bows as a precaution, a smirking teenage boy stumbled out. The girls gasped in horror and disgust.

"Well hello there" the boy said, with a wink thrown towards Artemis.

This sorta pissed off a certain lieutenant.

"How dare you speak to Lady Artemis like that! Why I could jus-" "Thalia," Artemis said, interrupting her. Her gaze returned back to the mortal boy. "You have 10 seconds to leave this camp, boy, before I do something drastic."

The foolish boy smirked. "Drastic, huh? How about you do something drastic, and get in one of those tents with me?"

Artemis eyes filled with rage and she was losing her patience, yet she managed to ignore him.

"Why are you here anyway, boy? These parts of the forest are _supposed _to be secluded" she said. _Yeah, away from foolish, stupid boys_ she added in her head.

"I was camping with my friends, when I decided to wander a bit." He said, and then added, "I'm glad I did"

That was the final straw.

"Your times up, boy" Artemis said through gritted teeth

"Wha-" but the boy interrupted by his sudden inability to talk.

The boy's eyes widened as he began to grow fur everywhere. Soon enough he was shrinking to a very small size. Before he knew it, the boy was a small, grey rabbit, running into the woods.

After a long silence, Artemis turned to the girls.

"So… who's hungry?"


	7. Chapter 7

It was one of those rare days.

Percy Jackson was…thinking (or at least trying to).

And believe me, when I say he was truly trying. Today was Annabeth's birthday, and he was determined to NOT screw up. Not like last year. Nowadays, Annabeth tells him to never speak of it again (lets just say it included a couple of ostriches and a VERY angry armadillo named Chad).

There was only one small little problem…he had no idea what to do.

After about an hour of thinking, Percy realized he was getting nowhere. He decided on getting a girl's point of view on the situation.

Clarisse was out of question. WAY out of question. Like in Australia. Katie Gardener was more sensitive, but she was visiting her dad for two weeks. The Aphrodite girls were a reasonable choice, but Percy was positive that they would give him an extreme makeover if he even came in within a ten-foot radius of their cabin. There was this new daughter of Hecate, but last time he tried to talk to her she turned him into a hybrid of a moose and a chipmunk. Don't even ask how **that **turned out.

After evaluating all the options, he ran out of girls to ask to help him. Or did he?

….

Percy warily approached the cabin. Last time he visited her on a Saturday, the results weren't pretty. She was known to have a temper.

The cabin seemed to have a silver gleam around it. Wolves, deer, and all sorts of animals were carved on the outside walls.

What Percy feared the most was waking up a whole army load of girls that already hate his guts.

Percy raised his arm and hesitantly knocked on the silver door. To his relief (not really), she answered the door. She was wearing electric blue pajamas that matched her eyes. Which, by the way, were glaring at him like he just killed a beloved pet.

"What?" Thalia snapped. Yeah…she wasn't in a good mood this morning.

"Well, I was wondering since today is Annabeth's birthday today, if you have any ideas for what I should do for her"

A few seconds passed…she slammed the door in his face. Percy sighed. He waited about 5 minutes before knocking on the door again.

The door swung open. Before he could say anything, Thalia burst out saying, "Look, if you wanna do something for Annabeth, why don't you make her a picnic or something, I bet she'll like that. Now go away".

For the second time today the door slammed in his face.

…..

It took all day, but he finally got it done. The picnic on the beach was ready.

He got up and made his way toward the Athena cabin, a grey blindfold in his hand.

He knocked on the door and waited.

A girl with light blonde hair and bold grey eyes answered the door with a smile. At least this girl didn't slam the door in his face.

"Hey Percy, what's up?" Annabeth asked, curiously.

"Oh, nothi-" before he could finish he grabbed her head and rapped the blindfold around it, grabbed her hand, and told her to follow him.

Annabeth smiled. She knew what he was doing. "This better not turn out like last year" she muttered, though still smiling.

When they got to the beach Percy took off the blindfold.

"Aww, Percy. Thanks so much!" Annabeth exclaimed, enclosing Percy with a hug.

Both of them closed their eyes, comfortable in the warm embrace. As they got out of the hug and opened their eyes, they jumped in astonishment.

Their picnic disappeared, and apparently so did the beach! It was replaced by…Wisconsin?

Surrounding them, cows lazily munched on grass, some occasionally doing their "business".

"What the-" they cried, not believing what was happening. But just as quick as it happened, the fields of grass were replaced by the deserts of the Sahara.

"What kind of twisted joke is this?" Percy exclaimed.

This continued for about an hour. Percy and Annabeth were teleported here and there, all over the world!

…_Meanwhile on Mount Olympus…_

The gods all laughed hysterically, watching two particular demigods being teleported to Chile.

Each took a turn teleporting them to a remote location and watching their confused and outraged faces.

…_Back on Earth… _

After an unwanted trip to the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, a drenched Percy and Annabeth finally ended back on the original beach. At a better glance you'd see that their picnic was still nowhere to be found.

Annabeth glared at Percy, her eyes screaming hate.

"Hey, at least this makes last year not look so bad anymore" Percy concluded.


End file.
